The other day I came across a beautiful vintage dress of my mother’s in the back of my closet. I remember grabbing this “70’s masterpiece” from the “gives” pile, years before, while helping my mother pack to move.
I said, “You can’t throw this out! It’s legendary!”
AUTHENTICITY AND THE VINTAGE DRESS
I envisioned her plucking it from some swanky boutique on one of the trips to Hawaii, she and my dad used to take. It was flowery and covered in bright blues, pinks, and greens. Instead of making apologies, the dress pulled off these seemingly uncoordinated colors boldly and with confidence. This dress was a big fabric grin.
She said, “Take it.” So, I did.
But, then, I forgot about it.
When it resurfaced last week, I smiled. I was reminded of how much I loved this dress on my mother. As I lifted the hanger off the rod and pulled the dress into full view, an unimpeded thought flashed across my mind. “I could never pull this off in public.” So, I started to place the dress back in the “inner bowels of my closet.” Then I froze. What was I doing?? There was a time when I would not have even hesitated to rock this dress socially.
I am very weird. I know this. My kind friends have gently acknowledged it, and they both love and are confused by it. There are parts of my personality that are oddly coordinated colors, but these facets are the make-up of my fabric. It dawned on me, facing this dress, that there are areas of my life that I have slowly hidden away – aspects of my colorful personality.
Have you done that – hidden parts of the authentic you because of past experiences? Brene Brown writes, in her book, The Gift of Imperfection, “Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up, and be real. The choice to be honest – The choice to let our true selves be seen.”
I recalled a close friend saying to me not long ago, “You hold your cards very close.” I didn’t always. I used to possess less of an internal censor, less of a filter system between my brain, and my expressed thoughts. I thought about her observation while standing in my closet. The truth is I had sheltered some of my more colorful personality attributes from certain people to avoid judgment and to appear more professional. I did it so I would not risk hurting people, and to reduce the risk of getting hurt.
Brene further states “Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we are supposed to be, and embracing who we are.”
The journey to being our true authentic selves has everything to do with self-acceptance.
So, I put on the dress.
It fit.
You may see me in it at Target.
Are there areas in your life, where you may not be living authentically? Are there changes you can make to be more in tune with who you are? Do you need me to send you the flowered dress?
We are all quirky and strange – It is that “weirdness” that makes us the bold, colorful patterns that are uniquely us. Work daily to wear it proudly. This week what single step can you take to be more true to your inner self? Write it down and keep it close to you.
If you liked this post wait till you read these!
34 Responses
Love that you posted a picure of the dress and you did rock it!
Thanks Coll!!
Great dress! It’s totally you!
Thank You Edith! Thank you for your card as well. I hope all is going well for you. How are the workouts going?
I absolutely love this! 🙂 and the dress is gorgeous!
Love this post! Awesome!
And the dress…. doesn’t shout “vintage” without the back story. It’s fantastic!
Thankyou Robyn! You are always so supportive. Can’t wait to see you!
Yes! I love the quotes throughout—so many great ones. And that dress looks like something my mom would have rocked in the 70’s. Awesome that it fits you! I love creative thought posts like this…
I think you look awesome in that dress! I think we all need to work on being ourselves more and not trying to fit in with society. We’re all unique individuals and that’s what makes us all so great!
Thanks Carly. It is a lifelong battle right? We have to keep reminding ourselves “it is okay to be me!!” Thanks for commenting. xo
Uh huh. I have been thinking about this the last few years, there is good in becoming the best we can be, as long as it is the real us. Maybe this is why I have met so many interesting “older women” in my life. Because they (we) get to a place where we no longer are overly concerned with what others think and we can truly be who we were meant to be. Which in the end is remarkably more interesting than the us that we believe people expect.
Thank you for being real (and bless you for including the photo!)
Amen Donita. Nicely done and you are a great writer. Thank you for taking the time to comment in detail. I loved reading it! I so agree. I love meeting women in their late 40 and above. Layers and layers of bull have been shed and they are getting down to the truth of their real souls and spirit. I love that. I am actually glad to be getting there!! xo
Way to go! Just being you is the best, thanks for the inspiration!
Thanks, Samantha! I appreciate your comment. 🙂
Love it! I used to be much more shy and reserved about everything, but as I’ve grown older, I care less about what other people think, and worry more about my own happiness (and that of my family, of course.) I’m glad you decided to rock the dress!
Thanks Shann. With age comes wisdom….we hope, right?
I am loving the quotes and the dress looks very beautiful! I bet you are definitely glad you kept that one around 🙂
Thanks for commenting Autumn. I really appreciate that you take the time to read and comment.
i couldn’t tell you how much I love this post! Being everything we aren’t is what society expects from us and it’s all I used to do. I finally heard my little voice inside trying to get out and be shown and I’m loving her even more!
Xoxox
May from http://www.mayliving.com
Ahhh…. Thanks, Nayara. I sure appreciate you saying so!
Wow that dress! You look stunning, like it’s made for you. So glad you decided to embrace it and wear it out! I have been working hard on being my authentic self for quite some time now… It is always a work in progress, especially when you have anxiety around people like i do! But I know that the harder I try to impress people, the less authentic me I am… Great post
Thank you for stopping on by Shannon. It is an ongoing process, right? Authenticity? I only just heard of the concept of “The Imposter Syndrome” that we women seem to carry around. Why do we do this? Work in progress, always!
The dress is great on it’s own, but knowing it was your mom’s is really cool. It looks great on you! Love the quotes.
Thanks, Mary! I love all those quotes too!
This is fabulous. Thanks for sharing! <3
Of Course! I love it when I get a little nugget of life lesson from something random. 🙂
I picked up “Gifts of Imperfection” a few month ago, but haven’t yet had the chance to read it…so you love it?! I really admire Brene’ Brown’s work!
I love Brene Brown!! Love her.
You rock! Love the dress. I have that outfit where I sometimes take it out to wear and then I’m like, “No I can’t” the one time I wore it was a hit. Let’s all be who we are! 🙂
Yessss!, Let’s be who we are!
I could not agree with that post more. Get to know yourself and then be yourself, stop trying to imitate everyone else.
Right, Sophia?? I know, it is an important thing to remind ourselves of.
It is easy to hide away some of our weirdness in an effort to fit in, but it never feels as good as being true to ourselves. So glad you decided to wear the dress, it looks great on you! Y
I love that. “Hide-away our weirdness.” That is a great thing to ponder. I always feel better when I am truly being me.